I am as free to receive God's love to the degree that I am open to His love.
God is always reaching toward me in love, but I am not always as freely receptive as I long to be.
How do I close myself to His love? Whenever I reject His words of acceptance and value to me, and choose to listen instead to those voices (past and present) that tell me that I am not good enough. Not worthy of love.
"Sin as Refusal to Recognize that We are Loved. Perhaps as a result of rejection [yes, in my case] or failed love relationships [yes, again], we do not know how deeply loved we are. We think that we have to keep proving that we are loveable."
Jewish Spiritual Guidance by Carol Ochs and Kerry Olitzky
As I read I John 1:5 -2:2, I am reminded that He is light and there is no darkness in Him. I confess my sin and bask in the light of His freeing love.
While reading Psalm 130, I imagine Christ on the cross and we talk. I am embarrassed that I doubt His love when I can barely look at his red-bloodied and ripped up face, skin and muscles. But I softly murmur, "I am sorry for not being more open to Your love for me." Forgive me for thinking that I should or could even earn your love. So foolish. So prideful.
Tears well up as I feel Him love me tender. No condemnation. No judgment. Just warm and whisper-soft like an enveloping blanket on a cold day falls His Spirit on me.
I love you.
After praying about what to write today, I am surprised to find a comment to a post that I wrote back in September. Funny, how God can speak to me (so gently) the same thing He told me two months ago. No sigh of exasperation at how slow I am to grasp what is true. Just patience. My defenses melt. I open and freely receive His love.
Read the post (that inspired today's post) "Does your heart need an umbrella" here.
Are you free to receive His love, or are you hiding?
Image Courtesy of: NewBeginnings2
Linking up with Emily at Imperfect Prose and Bonnie at Faith Barista
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